We're All Mad Here

You must go Mad Men yourself! Probably the most fun I had all day was creating a stylized 1960 version of myself. Damn I am hot! Work it cartoon approximation of Nina from the past!

Just More Of Me To Hate Baby

There's a lot of craptactular things going on in the world today. I told my Honey the other day that we should stop referring to things in the media as "current events," because the things we discuss today aren't actual events, they're just "current goings-ons." Reality shows, birthers, and "cankles" do not an event make.

Yes, the cankles things is what drew my attention towards my old post-o-matic today. Golds Gym was already having a Summer promotion to "Say No To Cankles," which if you're not familiar with the term, are apparently the new horrific body part of doom that all women must avoid, to cling to that last shred of self esteem. Which begs the question if there is some sort of ideal calf to ankle ratio that every women should be crying on a stair stepper every night in hopes to achieve? If so, I'm sure Cosmo will fill us in soon.

ABC News jumped on the cankle shaming wagon on Friday with it's article suggesting that "help is available." Thankfully we have Hortense over at Jezebel to thank for putting things in the proper light here. (I really recommend reading their whole take on the article, it's fantastic.)

You know what? There is no fucking way in hell that I should be worrying about the shapeliness of my goddamn ankles. I also should not have been worrying about "muffin-topping" or "thunder thighs," and I suspect most women wouldn't worry about such things either if these fucking trend pieces didn't insist upon drilling it into women's minds that they need to be physically perfect at all times or else. Are "cankles" the new "muffin-tops?" Sure, if you mean "a completely idiotic term coined in order to push diet plans and gym memberships while shaming women into feeling even worse about themselves."

Thank God there are online communities like Jezebel to help bring a little slice of fresh sanity to the giant heaps of reconstituted putrid filth being piled on our media plates daily.

Kitty Detailing While You Wait

We have two cats. Our black cat, Bart, is deathly affraid of the vacuum

cleaner and will go running to the farthest corner of the house as soon

as the switch goes on. Then there's our other cat, Sammy...

Underbelly cleaning prevents rust...

Change attachments to get at those hard to reach places...

What, They Don't Have Red Pens In Alaska?

This is just a sample of Vanity Fair's excellent piece in which they let their editors loose on Sarah Palin's disjointed resignation speech. Let's hope this helps grammar lovers everywhere who listened to more than 30 seconds of this speech, pick up the pieces and move on with their lives.

New Mad Men Poster!

I love Mad Men. Despite my obvious bias due to the fact that we have an special cocktail night just to watch it, I can honestly say that it is one of the best shows on television. The sheer multitudes of retro eye candy featured in every episode certainly doesn't hurt matters either. Here is the new poster just released to promote the upcoming season. See you next month Don Draper.