Today's Tom Tomorrow

This Modern World is a comic strip full of political satire and biting sarcasm. Sometimes it bites you pretty hard...

Ouch.

Just More Of Me To Hate Baby

There's a lot of craptactular things going on in the world today. I told my Honey the other day that we should stop referring to things in the media as "current events," because the things we discuss today aren't actual events, they're just "current goings-ons." Reality shows, birthers, and "cankles" do not an event make.

Yes, the cankles things is what drew my attention towards my old post-o-matic today. Golds Gym was already having a Summer promotion to "Say No To Cankles," which if you're not familiar with the term, are apparently the new horrific body part of doom that all women must avoid, to cling to that last shred of self esteem. Which begs the question if there is some sort of ideal calf to ankle ratio that every women should be crying on a stair stepper every night in hopes to achieve? If so, I'm sure Cosmo will fill us in soon.

ABC News jumped on the cankle shaming wagon on Friday with it's article suggesting that "help is available." Thankfully we have Hortense over at Jezebel to thank for putting things in the proper light here. (I really recommend reading their whole take on the article, it's fantastic.)

You know what? There is no fucking way in hell that I should be worrying about the shapeliness of my goddamn ankles. I also should not have been worrying about "muffin-topping" or "thunder thighs," and I suspect most women wouldn't worry about such things either if these fucking trend pieces didn't insist upon drilling it into women's minds that they need to be physically perfect at all times or else. Are "cankles" the new "muffin-tops?" Sure, if you mean "a completely idiotic term coined in order to push diet plans and gym memberships while shaming women into feeling even worse about themselves."

Thank God there are online communities like Jezebel to help bring a little slice of fresh sanity to the giant heaps of reconstituted putrid filth being piled on our media plates daily.

Horsin' Around with Hair

In Touch Weekly did something very strange to some horses [Via Jezebel]...

I keep going between liking them in a "Oh! Look at the pretty pretty My Little Ponies!" sort of way, and laughing in disbelief. I would probably think it was less odd if a horse stylist had done this instead of a human. I supposed opposable thumbs are sort of a requirement for doing extensive braid work though.