Unpalatable, Uncontrollable Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga and I started out as a bad romance, it's true. I underestimated her, made fun of her, and may have even labeled her as gimmicky. I was a monster. That was a very short lived portion of our times together though. I wised up pretty fast to the fact that she's smart, bizarre, and just plain amazingly talented. I have been riding that disco stick ever since.

This past week, the Times of London [Via Jezebel] put into words one reason that I like this lady so much, aside from the fact that I am addicted to her insanely catchy songs of course.

Queue Caitlin Moran of the Times:

Do you know why I love Lady Gaga?

…It's because in the 21st century what women need - second only to some watertight equal-pay legislation and, possibly, slightly wider parking spaces - is other women who are involved in popular culture but don't give a toss what anyone else thinks of them. I don't mean the faux-attitude of, say, the Pussycat Dolls or Fearne Cotton, who manifestly do care what people think, what with their carefully shot publicity material, alluring, non-scary outfits and auras of constantly available, non-threatening, mainstream sexuality. These women are little more liberated than cigarette girls in 1950s nightclubs.

No. I mean women who are right out there, doing what the hell they want, and who would clearly greet any attempt to criticise their appearance or attitude with wildly disbelieving laughter. Women who are unafraid to express aspects of themselves that seem alarming, unpalatable, uncontrollable or just plain horsescaringly bizarre. We need more rolemodels such as this. After all, it's hard to oppress a generation of women who, under the influences of their new heroes, are intent on dressing like hermaphrodite robots with fireworks coming out of their breasts.

Ahhh yes, the future looks bright. Better wear your razor shades.

Movies That Rocked My Decade

I decided to go with a top 20. Ten was not a sufficient number of movies to encapsulate an entire decade. I even had a squeeze a few movie in together to get to a top 20. I think those movies organically go together though, so I am pretty happy with my list. Emphasis on the fact that this is MY list by the way. I am not trying to say that these are necessarily the best movies made in the first decade of the 2000's. These are simply the movies that resonated with me the most. What was my number one you ask? Well I just look Up! What tops your list as best movies of the aughts?

On a side note, I got major grief from the boy friend for trying to combine movies on the list. He seems to think it is blasphemous and should never be done. I'm still going to do it though, I just thought you should know there are purer purists among us.

Pan's Labyrinth - Guillermo del Toro brings the magic so real you can almost touch it and mixes it together with a dark war story adding weight and realism to the fantastical.

Mulholland Drive - Dark, Haunting, and Erotic. Just how I like 'em. Perhaps the movie that most attached itself to my psyche this decade, David Lynch knows what he's doing.

Donnie Darko (and the Director's Cut) - Richard Kelly's dark yet beautify and optimistic masterpiece about the possible end of the world hits every note for me. Never has such a complicated premise been so flawless. I think for the record that watching the original and then the directors cut is the best experience.

Kill Bill Vol. 2 - The second volume of the Kill Bill movies was far superior to my liking. It had more heart and more of a sense of adventure than it's predecessor, dare I say slightly better music also.

American Splendor - Paul Giamatti's turn as Harvey Pekar is sheer brilliance. Seeing the real life characters that make up the movie's landscape appear in the film itself? A joy almost unmatched in any other film this decade.

Almost Famous - Cameron Crow started the decade off right with this semi-autobiographical work about his time as a Rolling Stones reporter. This film hit me at the peak of my classic rock addiction and has burrowed deep into my heart.

Amelie - Pure pixie like joy, shoved into movie form. It makes me want to eat ice cream on a bike on a peer. Also responsible for the birth of the Roaming Gnome.

City of God - Hard hitting gritty real life in the slums of Brazil. It is a testament to this movie that it is about hardships, brutality and violence yet all I remember is the beauty of it all.

The Royal Tenenbaums - Has there ever been a movie with more perfect comedic timing that Wes Anderson's Royal Tenenbaums? I enjoy the light in the movie much more than the dark, but it's paced so well you can't look away.

The Darjeeling Limited - Not as much of a fan favorite as The Royal Tenenbaums, but struck a chord with me on a very personal level. The search for spirituality is true to the hearts of many, and the cinematography is a love letter to the majesty of India, somewhere I have always wanted to travel.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - Containing my favorite role for not only Jim Carrey but also Kate Winslet (They always give her such stogy roles!). Joel and Clementine explores the cracks in our minds and relationships and perhaps come to a better understanding of just who We are.

Ghost Town - I have only watched this movie once, and it demands more viewing. From just one watch it was easy to mark this one of the decade's best in Romantic Comedy, but it offers so much more. Honestly this pick is about my love of Ricky Gervais more than anything else, this movie might have gotten bumped for Children of Men if it wasn't for him.

Hedwig and the Angry Inch/ Short Bus - John Cameron Mitchell is one of my heroes. A Fearless film maker, whose films could easily fill two separate spots. The thing that sticks with me the most about this movies is the sense that one must carve out their own family in life to find true happiness. And orgasms don't hurt either.

The Lord of the Rings Trilogy - Grossly misrepresented in end of the decade lists, Peter Jackson did us nerdly Tolkien fans proud in my opinion. He proved that it was possibly to adapt something of enormous scale to film and one-upped the entire industry. For me it was Ian McKellens masterful work as Gandalf that set the tone of the films and gave them the depth and heart that kept them true to the text.

Smiley Face/Pineapple Express - Insanely enjoyable films that also could have each had their own place on the list. I could watch them both on repeat. They get grouped together here because they are my pick for the classic stoner movies of the decade. One for girls (mostly in that is stars a girl finally), one for boys (in that is it sort of a mash up of an action movie and a stoner movie), both to be enjoyed by either gender. Watch them, see if I'm wrong!

Up - Oh Up. I've loved other Pixar movies before... but no one has taken my heart and ran with it until I met you. I am honestly getting choked up right now just thinking about the damn movie. Happens every time!

High Fidelity - Seeing that this movie was made in 2000 made the decade seem very long. It seems like I have been watching this movie forever, every time it's on. I don't see that stopping any time soon. It still inspires me, every time I make a list.

Y Tu Mamá También - I am always a sucker for a road movie, especially one featuring copious amounts of sexventure. This spicy little number also represents the fact that I was more interested in foreign films this decade, or at least better educated about them.

Spirited Away - Miyazaki is a modern master to the world of art. His hand drawn animation is hypnotic and breathtakingly beautiful as it chronicles the adventures of a young girl through the land of ghosts. So much more than a simple coming of age film.

Iron Man - This movie rules the land of kick-ass super hero movies that ruled the land of movies in general in the aughts. The acting is phenomenal, the pacing and plot are tight as a thriller, and it certainly doesn't come up short on the BOOM factor either. I don't think anyone could possibly have been disappointed by this film. It made Iron Man an even cooler comic book character, not something you can say for most super hero movies this decade.

Going Rogue vs. Sanitation

Ever wonder what happened to all those copies of Sarah Palin's new book after it's peak on the best sellers list? Well now we know...

(Via Jezebel)

Lolcat Samus

Why Dog?! Whhhhyy?

Look, I get it. Humans love to be sloth like and sedentary, and I understand the need to anthropomorphize our pets, too make them in our image if you will, but good Lord can we please at least give them an image what won't get their little doggy asses kicked down at the local fire hydrant?! Yes, for the Dog who wished he had nothing but has everything, here comes the Snuggie for Dogs. It's not like they have a "paw free" blanket called a COAT that they wear all the time or anything.

Look at this poor little follow silently pleading for help from the box at my local Walgreens. "Why don't you love me anymore? It it because I look too much like Benji and he reminds you too much of your coke filled escapades in the 80's?" It's always the pets who suffer the most...

Maybe this is for the dog owner who want to put his dog in it's place constantly. "You're a Snuggie wearing wiener dog! That's all you'll ever be! Don't give me those eyes! You know you love your little fleece dungeon! MWaha - haha - hahaha!" (Clearly, the cackle of a sadistic dog owner if I ever typed one.)

If the dachshund didn't look quite as cute with it rolled down to look like a jaunty cowl neck sweater I would consider it animal abuse.

Tina Fey & Steve Carrel In An Action Comedy?!

Yes Please! The trailer for Date Night makes it look like it could be a hilarious movie. We have to wait till April though?

My Current Dream Wedding Dress

Via Dolly Couture:

It's a little too rich for my blood, but I can dream.

Peer Into My Childhood Nightmares

When I was young we didn't watch many scary movies. I didn't even watch Gremlins like all the other kids because I was sure I would never sleep again. I didn't even let my cat, Kitty, sleep with me because of the dream I had in which she morphed into a demon.

I did find myself fascinated with the things that did scare me though, they held some sort of mysticism or power to be able to cause such fright in me. As Jezebel pointed out before Halloween, it was often the things from movies that weren't billed as being scary that had the most terrifying things to hide. Maybe because they were less expected?

I know I wasn't expecting to have the living flying-monkey-crap scared out of my watching Return to Oz, the all-around scariest non-scary movie ever in my opinion. Every single thing about this movie was frightening. Everything in Oz is now backwards and mean, and the scarecrow looks like a demonic circus clown. Oh I could stop there but then I wouldn't get a chance to mention the Wheelers, or the fact that the movie starts with Dorthy receiving shock treatment to erase Oz from her memory. (So kid friendly.) Ahh... see, but the part of the movie that starred in my nightmares was when Dorthy followed the queen past the mirrored rows of severed heads that the she would choose from to exchange with her own head. I believe there was even a part when one or all of them screamed due to a chicken. Long story short I could never own one of those Barbie make-up heads. Fuuuuuck that.

The movie that really mentally gripped me with unending fear was something that I have never watch since early childhood when it did it's damage, so I'm not really even sure if it's laughable or not. It is the TV version of Alice in Wonderland from 1985 featuring Carol Channing. Sounds terrifying right? NO seriously, parts of this may have been charming, I even vaguely remember them as such. But mark my words, when that Jabberwocky comes, you will wet yourself and run from the room screaming as any reasonable person would. This shit is off the charts evil. I distinctly remember Alice being trapped in a looking glass unable to reach her life beyond it no matter how hard she tried. Do they know what that kind of shit does to the mind of a child?? I thought for sure I was going to be trapped inside a mirror at some point in life and tried to figure out ways to prepare for it. I have to admit that that bit was one of the things that fascinated me the most though. It was scary in an existential way, that sort of thing is fun to mull over.

And Jesus - What about G'mork?! Damn you Never Ending Story!!

Yeah I guess it turns out I am still fascinated with the things that scared me, even some of the things that scare me now. I just have to try and remember I find them fascinating while they're in the process of scaring the crap out of me.

Heavy Flo: Flow Chart

(Via Jezebel) The coolest thing I've seen all day. SEE YOU IN HELL PROGESTERONE!! (from Heaven)

Nurse Joan To The Rescue

Ok, Mad Men was extremely and exceedingly awesome on Sunday. And I'm not just saying that because I stare transfixed at every scene soaking in the beauty and majesty and underlying fear and horror of times gone by. Oh no! There is so much more to this show than eye candy, it's got brain candy in spades my friends.

Today I keep thinking about the relationship between Joan and Peggy. Joan is a career woman who none-the-less has always been intent on keeping to her master plan of marrying a doctor and living happily ever after. Peggy is the new modern woman, not content to settle for anything, she is trying her hardest to carve out a little niche for herself in a professional world dominated by men who show her little to no respect.

In the last episode Joan had to face the reality, once again, that her dream life isn't all she thought it would be. Her husband turns out to be a horrible doctor and she doesn't find out he won't be a resident until after she has already quite her job at Sterling Cooper.

Jezebel has an amazing wrap up in which they correctly point out the, "Sadness, anger, weariness yet strength and resolve, all in that one moment" that Joan shows as she learns the news from her husband, stumbling in drunk after drowning his sorrows.

It's the next day however, during Joan's farewell party, that we see her strength in action. Without giving anything aways, even Peggy isn't able to handle the situation at hand, while Joan springs into action like a seasoned pro. Is there a moment when she realizes her own value as a woman in business and that maybe she has taken the wrong path?

I find myself at a loss for words and at a loss of time at the moment. I had just been musing about Joan in my head today and wanted to get this out there to anyone who was interested. Obviously (to anyone who saw the episode) I am leaving out probably the most insane and important things but I didn't really want to spoil it if you haven't seen it. Sufficed to say, I will keep eating my eye and brain candy on a weekly basis, and so should you.

Funny Or Die Uses Funny To Help People Not Die

"Funny or Die" always has it's collective finger on the pulse of current events, and as their

name implies, they don't disappoint with the funny. Here they are fighting for the plight of

the insurance company executive. Because if you spell something wrong, do you really

deserve to have surgery? I don't think so.

Protect Insurance Companies PSA from Will Ferrell

How Do You Ask Someone To Be The Last Person Killed By Their Insurance Company?

Stop Corporate Death Panels - Public Option Now

Today's Tom Tomorrow

This Modern World is a comic strip full of political satire and biting sarcasm. Sometimes it bites you pretty hard...

Ouch.

Viral Video: Japan Loves Arnold

Yes, this man is a Govenor now...

The Health Care Debate Is Bad For Your Health

I find is very hard to write on the subject of health care reform at all because the realities of the current American health care system become more and more a part of my everyday life as I get older. This happened very quickly in fact. During the election, Obama's promise of universal health care was an abstract concept to me, but one that I felt the need to get behind in order to help people less fortunate than myself I thought. Now though, my job situation has cause this issue to hit home more than ever as I am faced with prospect of not being able to afford my necessary monthly blood pressure medication.

It is because of the personal implication of this issue (not that I am under any illusion that things will instantly change the moment a bill is passed) that I find myself extremely disillusioned and disappointed at a large chunk of the conservative Republican wing of this country. Look I understand politics, and eight years of Bush should have taught me to be shocked by nothing, but it seems to me that the out right lie is becoming an all too common accepted part of our national political discourse.

The mainstream media is only interested in the idea that every story has two sides, no matter how fantastical or flat out fabricated the other side of the issue is. It is now up to us as media consumers to filter out our own bullshit. This takes some discipline and a little more time than most people are willing or able to give during a normal day. That is the reason I am passing on some helpful facts to dispel a lot of the myths and lies that are out there about Health Care reform. My source is moveon.org.

Top Five Health Care Reform Lies—and How to Fight Back

Lie #1: President Obama wants to euthanize your grandma!!!

The truth: These accusations—of "death panels" and forced euthanasia—are, of course, flatly untrue. As an article from the Associated Press puts it: "No 'death panel' in health care bill."⁴ What's the real deal? Reform legislation includes a provision, supported by the AARP, to offer senior citizens access to a professional medical counselor who will provide them with information on preparing a living will and other issues facing older Americans.⁵

Lie #2: Democrats are going to outlaw private insurance and force you into a government plan!!!

The truth: With reform, choices will increase, not decrease. Obama's reform plans will create a health insurance exchange, a one-stop shopping marketplace for affordable, high-quality insurance options.⁶ Included in the exchange is the public health insurance option—a nationwide plan with a broad network of providers—that will operate alongside private insurance companies, injecting competition into the market to drive quality up and costs down.⁷

If you're happy with your coverage and doctors, you can keep them.⁸ But the new public plan will expand choices to millions of businesses or individuals who choose to opt into it, including many who simply can't afford health care now.

Lie #3: President Obama wants to implement Soviet-style rationing!!!

The truth: Health care reform will expand access to high-quality health insurance, and give individuals, families, and businesses more choices for coverage. Right now, big corporations decide whether to give you coverage, what doctors you get to see, and whether a particular procedure or medicine is covered—thatis rationed care. And a big part of reform is to stop that.

Health care reform will do away with some of the most nefarious aspects of this rationing: discrimination for pre-existing conditions, insurers that cancel coverage when you get sick, gender discrimination, and lifetime and yearly limits on coverage.⁹ And outside of that, as noted above, reform will increase insurance options, not force anyone into a rationed situation.

Lie #4: Obama is secretly plotting to cut senior citizens' Medicare benefits!!!

The truth: Health care reform plans will not reduce Medicare benefits.¹⁰ Reform includes savings from Medicare that are unrelated to patient care—in fact, the savings comes from cutting billions of dollars in overpayments to insurance companies and eliminating waste, fraud, and abuse.¹¹

Lie #5: Obama's health care plan will bankrupt America!!!

The truth: We need health care reform now in order to prevent bankruptcy—to control spiraling costs that affect individuals, families, small businesses, and the American economy.

I hope these help dispel any crazy notions you have heard floating around. For a much more entertaining and hilarious look at health care reform and the efforts to stop it than I could ever produce, check out Tuesday's Daily Show.